Nailed.

27 Jun

 

There are few things in this world of fashion that really get my blood boiling.  Some of them include, bleeding lipstick, VPL’s,  dark panties light pants, bad hair extensions, or the dreaded quadruple bosom.  You’re not sixteen anymore, so the only thing that neon green Victoria’s Secret water bra gave you was a third and fourth breast.

Last but not least, that small detail that really cooks my goose…chipped nail polish.

(*insert gag reflex here)

Besides becoming completely useless in your day to day life (Yes I’m referring to you Housewives of Orange county!), there are ways to successfully protect that magnificent manicure. First things first, before the deed is done, ask yourself this one simple question; ‘Is this good timing?’  If you’re helping grandma with some gardening this weekend, you should not get your nails done.  If you’re leaving on a camping trip, you should not get your nails done.  If you’re on the run from a bunch of vigilantes, accused of a crime you didn’t commit,  and you will be constantly fighting them in hand to hand combat, you should NOT get your nails done!

Next, two words; ‘rubber, gloves.‘  because the dishes don’t care, and they definitely won’t be washing themselves.  Trust me.  I got a mani last Wednesday and with my torn gloves recently trashed, I refused to touch a dish until either a new set of rubber gloves were purchased OR ideally, someone else took care of the pile.  Needless to say, my Sunday night was spent in fresh gloves washing a week’s worth of pots and pans.  Don’t make your nails suffer the consequences of hot water, cheese graters, and harsh chemicals.  It’s unnecessary.

Finally, touch-ups are mandatory.  So, you’ve got a hot date tonight, and have taken the time to paint your pointers before heading to the office this morning.  That’s great.  Very pro-active.  But please, I beg you, PLEASE don’t ruin it.  Bring the polish with you!  This way when the copier slams on your finger again, or your boss goes on another power trip and you find yourself unpacking boxes in the storage room for three hours with nothing but a shoe lace and a key-fob, at least your nails will recover.  (No guarantee for you though… sorry.)  Chipped polish gets you a date at El Pollo Loco.  Fresh polish get’s you a date in Paris… France.

Just sayin’.

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5 Responses to “Nailed.”

  1. SandySays1 June 27, 2011 at 12:15 pm #

    LOL Funny! Ahhhh, you humans. I promise you my lip liner is always just so, my nails trimmed to perfection by Terry Tarmac, and the shades on my paw pads are perfectly powdered. Oh, and my hair is perfectly natural.
    Sandy
    http://www.sandysays1.wordpress.com

  2. Emmy June 27, 2011 at 12:57 pm #

    amen. i feel your pain. i feel like chipped nail polish is just as tacky as long french manicured toes…shudder. very funny post!

    http://oneinchapart.wordpress.com/

  3. Anita Martens June 27, 2011 at 2:57 pm #

    Ha ha…guilty…sometimes!! Love the faces Nic:)

  4. Kate Kruitbosch June 27, 2011 at 7:02 pm #

    hahaha its so true. honestly i always will carry the polish with me… its one thing to have a day or two of chipped toes you can hide under a close toe shoe or sock, but chipped fingernails are completely different!!

    haha love this:
    “If you’re on the run from a bunch of vigilantes, accused of a crime you didn’t commit, and you will be constantly fighting them in hand to hand combat, you should NOT get your nails done!” made me crack up!
    and LOVE the pics as always 😀

    • society finch July 4, 2011 at 10:47 pm #

      Thanks Kate!
      Agreed, if socks are an option, the toes can go for a time, but when it comes to fingers, the line is drawn!
      Jenn has personally been on the run from vigilantes, however she always manages to keep it fresh…. extreme talent!
      xo

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